On melancholy hill

skyscrapers, canterbury, landscape, view, river, boats, beautiful, sunset, clouds


I took this picture in March while walking on Waterloo bridge going back to the Waldorf. It was a Saturday afternoon, and London was stunning. I feel like every time I see a meaningful landscape I have to stop and take a picture not just to see what I have already seen, I have to take a picture to remind how I was feeling at the time. However, I believe that there is something even more powerful than pictures: music.

Music spins me around, takes me back to different places and times, makes me feel like I was living a specific moment again. When I listen to different songs, emotions take over; they remind me of smells, cities, corners, tastes, and people. Sometimes they make me so happy that I have to get up and dance, other times they upset me so much that I feel sick.

There is a quote from the movie Troy where Achilles says to Briseis: “I’ll tell you a secret. Something they don’t teach you in your temple. The Gods envy us. They envy us because we’re mortal because any moment might be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we’re doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.”

How powerful is music to take you back to something that you cannot ever live again? The problem is that what follows is nostalgia. Some moments are so unique or so intense that you hold on to them so tight even when it hurts so bad. Sometimes you have to put your headphones in your ears and go and sit up on that melancholy hill to watch the movie of the moments that you love or hate the most.

Melancholy Hill is the title of one of my favorite songs. The first time I heard it, I realized it was a melody that I already knew. I have listened to it ever since, again and again, feeling like it is a tune that has the ability to capture the abstract concept of time passing by, the beauty of looking someone right into the eyes, feeling in love, the power to crop you and that instant out of the rest of the world that continues spinning around your beautiful moment. Raindrops are coming out of my eyes and crashing on my phone every time I hear this song, every time that with sweeping insensitivity I decide to go back to a moment that can never come back. Then I rub my eyes and go back to now, to the busy streets, the trains and the planes.

If I could and I would, I’d go back to that afternoon, that sunset, that bridge. It was such a simple happy moment. Is it not magical when you are just happy? I know that I will never be able to live that instant again, but I can still go up on my melancholy hill whenever I want to.



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